Thursday, June 21, 2012

Last Warning

It's Flash #FridayFictioneers time! Here is my attempt for the Photo Prompt - got it down to 97-words!
I would appreciate any comments, helpful hints and critiques. I had fun writing this, I hope you enjoyed the story. Thank you!


“Last warning, Earthling!”

The dragonfly fluttered around a sun-baked rock before settling upon it. It had but a few seconds to flash its gossamer wings before the ray-gun blasted it into a smoldering ash.

Two tiny gray beings glide out from behind a rock, their luminous almond-shaped eyes taking in their destruction. One of the beings held up his gun, his wide lipless mouth curled in mirth.

“I gave the Earthling a chance to surrender.” It said in a high squeaky voice, “If they don’t heed us, we’ll have this planet under our command in no time!”

25 comments:

  1. Hahahahahaha! Cute. A good story to end my night with. Thanks.
    Here's mine: www.rochelle-wisoff.blogspot.com/2012/06/homework.html

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    1. Thank you for reading and sharing your thoughts! :)

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  2. Wishful thinking. I wonder what they'll say to humans.
    Very imaginative story.

    Mine's here: http://logo-ligi.com/2012/06/21/a-silent-moment/

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    1. My guess is they wouldn't live long enough if they ran into humans. :P
      Thank you for reading it!

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  3. Ha ha very well done :). Mine is here http://boomiebol.wordpress.com/2012/06/21/damsel-fly-friday-fictioneers-622/

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  4. Destructive little aliens...or whatever they are. Won't they be surprised if we locate their planet and destroy them first. lol. I'm on the list...if not... www.triplemoonstar.blogspot.com

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    1. I am curious as to where their planet is...maybe it's already destroyed and they're wanting to take over ours? Thank you for reading. :)

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  5. Very well written. I love short stories such as yours, as they give the full effect of reading the whole book in less than 30 seconds. Keep penning. Here is mine.
    http://reeflections.wordpress.com/2012/06/22/friday-fiction-life-you-and-me/

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    1. Why thank you! I love the challenge of writing a 'whole' story in 100 words or less. Thank you for reading!

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  6. That really made me laugh ... we usually associate 'earthlings' with us humans and it was great to see an alternative to that 'reality'. Thanks

    Just as a point of personal preference I'd probably take out either high or squeaky as I don't think you need both to determine their type of voice.

    Here's mine: http://womanontheedgeofreality.com/2012/06/22/friday-fictioneers-gramps-and-me/

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    1. I actually had thought about taking out 'high' but at the last minute, left it. But you are right, it really isn't needed. :) Thank you so much for reading and your critique. Very much appreciated! :)

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  7. This is brilliant! Love your imagination! Mine's on the list - the story, not... oh, you know!

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    1. Thank you for reading it! Yes, my imagination tends to run away from me at times. ;)

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  8. Haha, I got such a kick out of this! It was a nicely done little twist. Thank you for sharing.

    Here's mine:
    http://sarahthestoryteller.wordpress.com

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    1. Thank you for reading and replying! I enjoyed your story very much, btw. ;)

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  9. Imaginative take on the prompt and well written. Mine is here and linked as well: http://readinpleasure.wordpress.com/2012/06/21/fridayfictioneers-the-omen/

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  10. haha this is so cute :) nicely done Mahjira!

    http://writersclubkl.wordpress.com/2012/06/22/friday-fictioneers-human/

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    1. Thank you! Thank you for stopping by and reading it. I'm glad you enjoyed it. :)

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  11. This is great, I thought of children actually playing they were aliens. Wonderful and sweet even though sci-fi which is a great combination. thank you for sharing.

    http://vsichalwe.wordpress.com/2012/06/22/friday-fictioneers-3/

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  12. Wonderful! This story has some very fun episodes coming in the future! Great job!

    http://kbnelson.wordpress.com

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  13. Dear Mahjira,

    It's going to be a long campaign to get us under control. Great story. Loved the feisty nature of the aliens. Might be a story in seeing them confront a human with that ray gun.

    Aloha,

    Doug

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  14. Aliens with a Napoleon complex. Will that gun work on earthlings with a little more, um, size?

    http://thebradleychronicles.wordpress.com/2012/06/21/flash-fiction-friday-shearing-placid/

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  15. LOL, what misguided aliens. If that's what they're like, we might stand a chance. I didn't notice anything to critique. Loved your description of the way the aliens looked.

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